The serious boyfriend, girlfriend thing. At the age of 25, that is what I am doing with this amazing man named Glenn. We have been dating since about the same time the police called my mom at 2AM on the night of our first kiss, because I wasn’t answering my phone. That is a story for later. Glenn currently lives an hour and a half away from me while he is going to grad school and I start my career. Oh, the joys of a little distance. Oh, and I travel about 2 weeks a month for work across the great country of ‘merica which is even more distance and this is how we make it work for us.
Be mad; it is OK.
Stuff happens and days are going to be bad, that is life. Glenn works really long shifts while he is going to school, and most days he is just ridiculously tired. What I have learned is that him being tired or upset at the world does not in any way, shape, or form mean that he is mad at me. (Apparently the whole world doesn’t revolve around me, who knew?) Or when I get super crazy because a project at work isn’t working out, he has learned to just tell me that I will get through it and he is there for me if I need help. Being mad for a little while, just to be mad or scream at the top of your lungs while riding in the car on the way to church, because you are frustrated and then start laughing because you are being a dramatic is OK. In moderation, Glenn would say.
The C word.
Talk to each other. About every single thing. Don’t leave anything, I mean anything out. If you are dating someone and you want to marry them one day, you have to tell the truth, all of it, all of the time. Lying can be the worst thing to ever happen to a great relationship. COMMUNICATION IS KEY!
Date Nights via Skype
I know this is said over and over again, but really do the date-night thing. It doesn’t even have to be in person. We didn’t start having Skype date nights until about halfway through our relationship, so cheers to finally putting talk into action! Every Tuesday night, Glenn and I log online and Skype. I could tell you that we mainly talk about the fabulousness of our lives, but I would be lying. Most of the time we just play games online together and he gets mad because I beat him, or we change the game if he is winning. Our date nights are just about intentionally setting a time to be with each other throughout the week.
My only advice for when you have a fight is to remember this: you are on the same team. You are on the same side of this whole life thing. I adore doing life with Glenn and I hope you glean some usefulness from our relationship findings in your own.
-Kate from Revelrey